Dr: Congratulations on your pregnancy! You can make a new appointment with my assistant.
Me: Ok. ummm... I have a couple of questions first.
Me: Is there any foods I should avoid?
Me: like cheese? Especially from France?
Dr: And why would you avoid cheese from France?
Me: I think because it is unpasteurized.
Dr: French women don't give up cheese. Do you eat a lot of it?
Me: A lot? Not really.
Dr: Well, then you should be fine.
Me: Ok. No warnings about wine or beer either?
Dr: Do you drink a lot of alcohol?
Me: No. Well, maybe an occasional glass of wine at dinner.
Dr: Well, as long as you are not drinking excessive amounts of alcohol, you should be fine! Anything else?
Me: I don't think so.
Me (walking away muttering under breath): Europeans
Dr (shaking head): Americans
(while the people are real and this conversation did take place, all events and sayings are paraphrased. Believe word for word at your own risk)